Afrikan Innerspace

I haven’t felt this way…. EVER!!!! She got all up in my head and my heart…. I allowed that. I even told her that I was most definitely considering being a “one woman man”. This GIRL ripped my fuckin heart out. SMFH!!!!! I KNEW this would happen. All the stuff she said to me about loving me and all the otha stuff bout “neva feeling for another like she felt for me” HA!!!! actions SO SO speak louder than words. I allowed this woman to get up in my psyche and my emotional space and now I’m left holding a 2 dollar bill in england = translation: WITH NOTHING and actually at a loss. Think about it, here it is 3 in the morning and I’m up purging my heart out while she’s probably cuddled up with this new older career guy ($$$$)… who, keep in mind they haven’t even known each other that long (just fuckin met like a week ago). I feel so fuckin betrayed, its not even funny. Granted we weren’t technically in a relationship, however we WERE TALKING!!! SMFH… or at least I thought we were…. why else would I spend hrs on the phone wit somebody I had a history with talking about “settling down”. SMFH!!!!!! They say what goes around comes around, so I realize I probably had this coming, but, REAL TALK… I neva did ANYTHING with ANYBODY else while we were talking!!!!!! so serious!!!!!

I can’t believe I allowed myself to fall victim to a big butt and a smile… I mean its obvious that this new older dude is clearly buying her and interested in the physical… Sure this may be an “assumption”, but really weigh the facts together : SMFH!!!! I’m not even gonna get into it!!!! Shorty got me HURT…. like seriously. I’ve NEVER been this fuckin down, hurt, confused, heated…. WOW!!!!! She played the shit outta me. All that stuff she told me, all those lies she said to me, the emails, the faux interest!!!! I don’t even know… that shit seems like just that…. SHIT!!!! She OBVIOUSLY neva meant any of it. Just the fact that I didn’t hear from this girl for a WEEK (and still haven’t) afta we had THE conversation, where I pretty much said what my intentions were (of settling down) and then I just so happen to randomly read her blog and find out that she’s had an “awakening” with the dude she JUST MET A FUCKIN WEEK AGO!!! WOWOWOWOWOW!!!!! SMFH!!!! obviously she lied about all the stuff she eva said to me about how she felt about me… SIGH!!! My head’s starting to hurt… SMH, I DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!